Sydney Sweeney and Secret Straight Guy Bowen Yang Are SNL’s Latest Hookup

Bowen Yang bravely came out as straight during the latest episode of Saturday Night Live.

In the skit — aptly titled “Bowen’s Straight” — host Sydney Sweeney admits to cast members Heidi Gardner and Ego Nwodim that she’s developed an “itsy bitsy crush” on Yang. But it could never work because he’s gay, right? Well, not exactly.

Gardner and Nwodim promise the Euphoria star that Yang is actually “straight as they come”’ and “just plays gay for laughs,” despite the fact that he just made a Boygenius joke to the entire room. That’s just what straight guys do, obviously! Seconds later, Yang is suddenly making out with famously-not-queer queer icon Gina Gershon in the SNL hallway before brushing off her attempts to call him “babe.”

Needless to say, Sweeney is ready to shoot her shot. Later, she corners Yang in the hallway and asks what his “type” is.

“Oh, you know, blonde, smart, heavy naturals,” he replies. “[…] You get tired of laughing with the little boys, let me know.”

It turns out that he’s a perfect match for Sweeney, whose type happens to be “gay-presenting Asian podcasters.”

Naturally, the two immediately start ripping each other’s clothes off in Yang’s SNL office. When Sweeney nervously asks if they should use protection, Yang reassures her: “No, no, it’s fine: I’m on PrEP.”

Unfortunately for Sweeney, he’s not just straight… he’s the late-night show’s resident player, who gives her the textbook post-coital brush-off, saying “I have a lot going on.”

“I gotta keep up appearances with the whole gay thing, it’s sort of my meal ticket,” he adds. When Sweeney asks why he can’t just be straight, he replies indignantly “Get off my back! Whatever, I’m going to Paris.”

Cut to Yang jetting off to Paris with two other blonde girls, as Sweeney miserably remarks, “I got played by Bowen Yang.”

Oh, well. Better luck next time!

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